An Open Book
Yes, I
was that kid who was scorned by the teacher for talking to friends during class
in elementary school. I didn’t understand the cues like when someone speaks a
sentence that has hidden meaning to it. I got in trouble for messing around and
chattering non-stop. I’m going to make the public announcement that the
“trouble” I got into were measly timeouts and callouts from the teacher. I’ll
also remind you that this was elementary school: We learned basic stuff from
how to write cursive to how to do basic algebra (eg. x + 1 = 3). My mother
actively made me learn everything before school even started. I was quite bored
at school, however, there was no denying that I was a chatterbox.
Several
years ago, you could ask something extremely personal and I’d tell you. If I
had known my social security number back then, I might’ve blurted it out (to be
honest, I still don’t know). I was an open book because I trusted people very
easily. I’d also forget what I’d be talking about the second I blurted it out.
The only thing I kept were petty grudges but even those didn’t last long.
Showing my emotions was easy and I never felt guilty for blurting something. If
I did keep a secret, I’d give away that I was hiding something and I’d be
uncomfortable under the mountain of guilt that would sit in my stomach until I
blurted it out. Because of it, nobody trusted me to keep their secrets (fair
enough).
My
parents, for years, have taught me what is okay to say and what is not.
Sometimes even they wouldn’t tell me something in-case I blurted it out to the
wrong person. I’m grateful because I know not to give my credit card number to
a stranger. I can keep things private and I can pick up a couple cues now and
then.
I’ve
matured, but my blunt demeanor hasn’t changed. If you ask for my honest
opinion, I won’t hold back. When someone says they have a social problem they
need to fix, I offer to confront both parties; I’m not afraid to “stick my neck
out.” I’ve changed from when I was younger, but I still have distinct roots of
my personality.
Do any of
you have a personality trait that was more extreme in the past?
My semi-tamed personality trait: introvertedness. Yes, I know that's weird for me to say because I'm literally still so ridiculously introverted, but this is actually me making an effort to engage with people, after years of learning how to act more normal (ish). Me in elementary school was just a hot mess who didn't know how to interact with humans AT ALL (unless they were teachers - I was good at charming teachers). I spoke like, maybe 20 words a day.
ReplyDeleteI would say mine is being spontaneous. When I was younger, if I wanted to do something, I would just do it even if it wasn't part of my plan for the day, etc. As I got older, I think I began to stick to my plan more because I'm much busier so I can afford to just throw out my schedules for the day, but I still do things without planning, just not as often.
ReplyDelete